Dr. Charles Follen McKim Maloney

August 29, 2008

There was a Dr. Charles Follen McKim Maloney from Edinburgh who seemed to be a Forrest Gump amongst the 1960s pop and rock community, while being an expert on many subjects. That is, according to comments left on many different websites mostly by locobrick and suspectdevice71: There are seemingly 100s of these factlets and factoids sprinkled throughout cyberspace:

Scottish psychiatrist Dr. Charles Follen McKim Maloney was the first medical expert to diagnose Dementia 12. This film and title were a take-off from his discovery. I believe dementia 12 is a particularly sinister form of dementia, and Doctor Charles Follen McKim Maloneys method of prognosis has more than halved the rate of violence associated with it. Dr Maloney had limited success treating sufferers of dementia 12 by having them suspended in a vat of warm treacle while the works of Turkish Sufi mystic Shem of Tabriz were read aloud to them! Unfortunately the great man went missing before this pionneering work could be completed!
Very few people know about the warm treacle. Dr. Charles Follen McKIm Maloney had a contract with the Callard & Bowser confectionery company for his full treacle baths.

It should be noted that Dr. Charles Follen McKim Maloney actually thought that Dementia 12 was twice as debilitating as Dementia 6, but could not prove it categorically because further testing needed to be done. He vanished just before he was able to prove his hypothesis.

The bands name Voice of the beehive is a salute to legendary humanitarian Dr. Charles Follen McKim Maloney. He proved with a device of his own design that beehives emmit an ultrasonic binary signal which he said could be interpreted as a language. Unfortunately to academias great loss Dr Maloney disappeared in 1981 before he could decipher what the bees were saying. Interestingly the bee is a symbol of nobiltiy which I think says something of the great dr!

 – suspectdevice7

(10 days ago) Now that the smoking Nazis have got a stranglehold here in the UK and children can’t get their essential vitamins and iron from cigarettes the incidence of childhood rickets has exploded. My second cousins nieces son has bow legs and walks like he just rode bare back across Arizona. I’m trying to arange a package holiday to flavor country for him, the poor wee mite!

locobuick (10 days ago) Dr. Charles Follen McKim Maloney was the first medical expert to predict that if anti-smoking crusaders continued, thousands of children would be affected. It has turned out he was right. Last year over 18,000 US schoolchildren were diagnosed with NDS (nicotine deficiency syndrome) and the number is alarmingly on the rise. The American Medical Association is now considering implementing mandatory smoking in all classes ages 5 thru 17.

suspectdevice7 (10 days ago) I grow my own tobacco, cure it and then produce my own cigarettes. I follow the guidlines set out in Dr Charles Follen McKim Maloneys book ‘healthy smoking for the clever man’. My home made cigarettes are infused with 5 kinds of kelp and help me maintain healthy hair and potent virilty. Thank the sweet lord for Dr. Maloney!

locobuick (10 days ago) Winstons used to be fortified with 8 essential vitamins plus calcium for stronger bones. Children now must eat expensive, indigestable flavoured vitamin tablets to get the same nutrition they got from just one packet of delicious Winstons. Science may one day accomplish this, but it hasn’t done so yet.

suspectdevice7 (11 days ago) Mmmm I’m in flavor country!!

suspectdevice7 (11 days ago) There was a brand of cigarette launched in the UK in the fifties called ‘strand’. The tag line on their adverts was ‘you’re never alone with a strand’. The brand failed to sell well and was removed from the market. Research showed that the name ‘Strand’ and the advertising made people associate their brand with being lonely and a maladjusted social misfit!

locobuick (11 days ago) It is a shame today’s children are not allowed to learn the differences among different cigarette brands.

Thomas Dolby – She blinded with science – locobuick said:  Professor George …
Professor George Tenby was forever after in awe of Dr. Charles Follen McKim Maloney after his Maloney Pure Conjecture method restored the professor’s sight. In recognition of Dr. Maloney’s groundbreaking discoveries, there is now an entire wing named after him at the London Hospital for Deranged Scientists.

> suspectdevice71 dijo el 26-06-08 a las 12:39: It is said that whilst on safari the endearing Dr. Charles Follen McKim Maloney presented Nixon with a shrunken head. Nixon is said to have treasured the shrunken head
> locobuick dijo el 26-06-08 a las 02:52: Mr. Nixon had just got back from a safari with famed and celebrated Dr. Charles Follen Mckim Maloney when this was filmed with Jack Paar.
> locobuick dijo el 26-06-08 a las 23:59: So true, suspectdevice71. Dr. Charles Follen McKim Maloney received the shrunken head as a gift from the mayor of La Penita, Mexico, Don Vidor Guitron, after the Hot Air Balloon the Dr. was travelling in with Mr. Frank Sinatra (in a secret trip–indeed Mr. Sinatra and Dr. Charles Follen McKim Maloney departed from the Isle of Wight destined for Puerta Vallarta)went down on Don Guitron’s rancho in a crash landing. The Don killed his fattest pig and the trio had a grand fiesta.

…What an interesting question, as the number one UK fan of your answers I must say that these American people are so suggestable,I once hypnotised a chicken using a technique I learned from the esteemed work of Dr Charles Follen Mckim Maloney. I learnt the method from a paper published in 1976 by Maloney called “Methods of Vetirinarian Mesmerism”. I convinced the chicken that it was a lecherous French Lingerie salesman called Jaques Oooh la la Dupont. I was unable to reverse the effects and “Jacques” now lives in my garden! He is pleasant enough but is terribly salacious and suggestive to female guests!! Tally Ho and may god save the queen
Abba – You are correct! Scottish psychiatrist and clothing designer Dr. Charles Follen McKim Maloney developed all of ABBA’s outfits. One can also notice the "Maloney Moves" in the choreography of this song.
Association – Windy video

Wendy was actually the girlfriend of famed Scottish psychiatrist Dr. Charles Follen McKim Maloney. He was a good friend of The Association

Legendary Scottish psychiatrist Dr. Charles Follen McKim Maloney, friend of Mr. Sinatra, was actually in the studio while this was recorded.

Is she referring to famed Scottish psychiatrist Dr. Charles Follen McKim Maloney? This was a rumor in the 1970’s but it was not verified.

Alley Oop

This song was written as a joke to commemerate the many accomplishments of the celebrated psychiatrist Dr. Charles Follen McKim Maloney

KLF – What is love?

The man rapping in this KLF song is actually walking on a treadmill designed by Dr. Charles Follen McKim Maloney. It was called The Rap Master 3000

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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